Dear Bite,

Dude…. this mask acne…. I can’t anymore. My chin hasn’t seen a breakout like this since the middle school days of bad patchy peach fuzz and a constant oil sheen over my face. The hell do I do? Look I know we’re all wearing masks 90% of the time but there’s gonna be at least a minute or two when someone’s gotta see this face and it may as well be pretty. 

-Maskne

 

Dear Maskne, 

All of us are going through the same exact thing, I promise you no one is going to judge you or your broken out face. My best advice is to take a trip to Walmart (as if you weren’t going to go this weekend already) and get yourself some CeraVe scrub and invest in a clear mask. As embarrassing as it may seem at least your peers will be able to see your shining face (and you’ll feel better too). 

-Bite 

 

Dear Bite,

With fall coming, so are my seasonal allergies. And the moment someone sneezes these days everyone dives for cover like it’s a war zone. What do I do when I sneeze in class and everyone thinks it’s corona?

-you know which dwarf I’d be 

 

Dear Sneezy,

Allergies suck, point blank period. I say that you hold in every single urge to sneeze until you explode. There may be another route where you just stop caring in class and sneeze until your heart’s content along with keeping a secret stash of Claritin in your backpack as well.

-Bite

 

Dear Bite,

My roommates have been non-stop doing the WAP dance and it’s becoming a problem. In the car, in the dorm, through headphones on the way to class. Literally everywhere! I just  so empowered when I hear the Cardi B tell me she wants that Big Mac truck in that little garage. 

-WAP addict

 

Dear WAP addict,

As a fellow WAP addict I completely agree with your pain and frustration in regards to listening to that damn song all the time. I myself have managed to wean myself off of the song by listening to some Megan Thee Stallion (Captain Hook is a personal favorite). While still feeling empowered I get the thrill of  catchy words while not constantly hearing Cardi B on loop

-Bite